I know that many of my friends have been seeing me post transformation pictures and information about Plexus quite a bit on my facebook page. It’s so easy to see the changes that have happened in me because they are pretty visual. Losing 70 pounds is no small thing… literally. But there’s something I want you to know… I loved (and still do) that bigger version of me!

I had so many issues with self-esteem and body image growing up. I was never thin enough or pretty enough. I hated my body. And I truly believed that no one would or could find me attractive… that I was unlovable. I ate very little and worked out obsessively. I did a lot of things that were not good for my body in the hopes of reaching some goal… a goal that never came… because it didn’t how matter little I weighed or how much weight I lost – it was never enough.

And then I got married and I decided I couldn’t keep living this way. I needed to find balance. And when I let go of my unhealthy and obsessive behaviors, the weight started to creep back on. And it became more and more difficult to lose it without sinking back to old unhealthy habits. So it continued to slowly pile on despite my efforts to find healthy diets and ways of living.

It took me a while, but I learned to love this bigger version of me. She showed me that I didn’t need to be a size 0 to be happy. Despite what people may think – you don’t have to be thin in order to be happy. She showed me that I could be big and beautiful in this larger frame. I never had trouble seeing the beauty in others, regardless of size, but I’ve always struggled to see it in myself. Those moments when I felt beautiful in my bigger body only served to give me a greater appreciation for myself. And my husband proved to me again and again that I could be loved regardless of my size. His affection for me never changed as I got larger and he proved to me that I could be loved as both big and small me.

Am I proud of my weight loss? … Absolutely! Do I still work out and challenge myself? … Definitely! But those were just fun by-products of getting healthy and regulating my body. I work out to honor my body, to challenge it, to take care of it, and to reach new goals. But I’m not being super restrictive with food… in fact, I still eat a lot of stuff I probably shouldn’t. And I’m not going overboard on the exercise either. I do what I feel like doing and nothing more. And sure I have loose skin and stretch marks but those are my battle scars, little reminders of the struggles I have overcome.

Ultimately, I’m proud of where I came from and I’m so grateful for that plus sized girl who taught me so much. I love her dearly because she was pretty brave and strong to endure everything she was dealing with. And I hope you’ll know that no matter what size you are – you are fun. You are lovable. And you are beautiful. There is nothing to fix because there is nothing wrong with you. You are a gift to those who know you and you deserve to love yourself too!